crayons

february 16, 2012

People Who Color My Life

My babies and my hubby are major crayons in my crayon box.  

They keep my life full of color!  I have four children; two girls and two boys.  

A nearly 12 year old, a nearly 9 year old this coming Monday, a 6 year old, and a 17 month old. They keep me really busy too!

My husband and I have been together close to 20 years and married for 12 years this April.  He is the most wonderful man, and I am so blessed to be married to him.  They way I see it is like this; I was rescued by my family- in the same way that light fills the room and dispels darkness, my family pushes every dark place in my heart to the surface and out!  My hubby covers a multitude of my mistakes with pure,conditional love; and I am growing into a less selfish person.  I feel more able to embrace life and risk because of his daily commitment to me.

I remember the beginning years of our marriage-

I was lonely even with him around, hesitant to let him see the deeper feelings of my heart, angry at myself constantly, and deathly afraid to reveal the secrets of my dreams let alone the horrors of my past.  But over the years he has taken out his crayon {color Onyx} and redacted those hurtful places in me.  I tell the truth when I say he continues to do so whenever I need that from him!  I love him even more because, before he ever attempts to black out my hurt;

he pours his love over them first.  His love is so healing, it soothes my soul and provides me a safe cushion to fall on.  He shows me that he is here to stay no matter how ugly and dirty my insides show to be.  The healing that takes place in my life because of the crayons in my box, my family, allows me to go out into the playground (the world) and play.  My lovely crayons are why I can now allow new crayons {new people, new experiences, new opportunities}

basically- the crayons of the world- COLOR ME IN!

I am stronger, bolder, wiser, confident, forward, and more vulnerable than I have ever been.

My life is a canvas- every person I meet has a paint brush - and I am more than willing to provide the paint - just pick a color!